Full Term

Just a quick post to say how excited I am that we are full term!! Although 40 weeks is technically full term pregnancy, they consider 37 weeks a full term baby. She would be able to survive outside my belly more than likely with no outside medical help. That is huge. It is such a peace of mind that we have made it to this milestone. Now, I would like her to wait until her anticipated scheduled arrival date haha but I am happy to know that if I were to go into labor before then she would be a healthy girl. It certainly feels like I have a full term baby in my belly!

35 & 36 Weeks

Looks like we have a tentative birthdate!!

Our last appointment was on Tuesday, 9/13 and we found out she was still in breech position. The doctor explained that we could either wait another week and see if she flips and if she doesn't we have the option to do the Version or if we know we didn't want to have the Version done we could schedule our c-section. We chose to schedule the c-section!

I felt better immediately that we could schedule it. I was incredibly nervous before the appointment (I even wrote my name wrong on something at some point) because all this up in the air and unknown was just killer. The doctor was fine with our decision. In fact, part of me thinks he agreed with not doing the Version. He even made a small comment that if it was his wife he would probably feel the same. Interesting.

She could still flip and if she does then we go back to square 1 and the "old fashioned" way of delivering a baby which is fine with me obviously - although knowing when she is coming is kind of fun for a planner like me and is a blessing with a retail schedule like Chris's. Speaking of Chris's work, they have been very accommodating with everything which we are very grateful for. Not a place of unemployment should be difficult but let's face it, in today's world not many companies seem very accommodating with the birth of a child which is sad. He is able to take off 5 days so that he can be with me the whole time in the hospital and a couple days at home. I am so relieved by that.

Anyway, back to the c-section. So, the doctor took out the calendar and we looked at the possible days for my surgery. Chris and I wanted to go for Friday, October 7th so that it would be as close as possible to my actual due date and my parents coming. Plus, I like the sound of the 7th as her birthday! The 7th was available. The doctor on call that day is a new doctor to the practice although not a new doctor herself as my doctor assured me. We will meet with her next Friday for my regular appointment which makes me feel a lot more confident that we can have some face time with her prior to the big day. Fingers crossed we like her. I don't need to want to be best friends with the woman; just feel confident that she is competent!

The doctor answered a few questions about the c-section. Chris can stay with me the whole time. Once she is born, she will be given to Chris to hold (I'm assuming after she is cleaned off and measured/weighed) and he can bring her over to me so I can touch her and give her kisses. Unfortunately, I can't hold her immediately because they will still need to stitch me up but as long as one of us is with her I am okay. He can go with her to the nursery where she'll get her newborn care (any necessary shots or treatments). They will stitch me up and wheel me into the recovery room where I can hold her and hopefully be able to nurse her for the first time. After the recovery room, I will go to my regular room on the labor & delivery ward where I will stay for approximately 3 nights. I say approximately because I am hoping for an early discharge. We go in on Friday (our surgery is scheduled for 1pm but we arrive at 11am) and I would love to be able to go home Sunday afternoon or evening instead of staying over to Monday. The doctor had said it is possible for women to stay only 2 nights but I think they are cautious about it. We'll see. I'd much rather have my little family at home and have just the 3 of us cuddling together!

My mother-in-law will be able to come on Friday for the actual delivery and stay with me on Wednesday when Chris goes back to work. I am so happy about that! It is great to have her be around to help. The Grandparent Unit (GU) as my sister calls them aka my mom & dad arrive that Thursday for 2 weeks and obviously I am THRILLED by that. Not only can I not wait for them to meet her, I am so happy to have them around in general with me and helping me. They make great baby nurses haha! Then, my sister comes at the end of their stay and it'll be so great having her here to pick up where they left off and transition us into our real lives (like releasing us back into the wild haha).

So as of this post, it is 3 weeks from today! I cannot believe it. Chris and I are just dumfounded. We are trying to finalize anything left on the to-do list and prepare as best as possible. I have been cooking extra of every meal and freezing it for easy dinners before and after my parents arrive (not that Chris doesn't cook because he actually does but on nights he goes into work I'm left to my own devices). This weekend we are visiting a possible pediatrician and going car shopping. We are hoping to lease a Kia Sorrento or Sportage. My little 2 door, 1999 honda civic ain't gonna cut it! That's a big item on the to-do list haha. Once we get that, we get the car seat in, hopefully figure out the damn stroller, put up the pack and play and her stuff should be ready to go!! We're trying to keep busy so we don't just burst at the seems with excitement. We're going to try to get in some relaxation in between all this and maybe a date night or two :)

Dear Adelaide,
Holy moly your mama and daddy can't wait to meet you! We are just about jumping out of our skin at this point! You are getting so big in mama's belly. The doctor estimates you will be about 7 1/2 - 8 lbs at birth which puts you around 6lbs at this point. Some babies are born around 6lbs so you really are almost full size! You seem to take up every square inch of my belly. I feel a body part sticking out of each side which never ceases to amuse me. Although your mama complains about being big and uncomfortable, she sure does love having you so close and safe with her all the time. I thought I wouldn't miss being THIS pregnant but I tell you I will miss feeling you move and react to noises and voices. It's such a special bond that we have. But, I want to share that love with your daddy. He is so eager to meet you and I want him to be able to hold you and love you the way I can with you in my belly. He is just dying for you to come out and play, little one. As we sit around or do our daily activities, we imagine you with us and it's becoming a clearer and clearer vision. We talk about what you would be doing if you were here and the places we can go and where we can't wait to take you. You have so many wonderful adventures waiting for you and SO much love! Your family will just eat you up and spoil you rotten and I wouldn't have it any other way!! 3 more weeks, Junebug.

All My Love,
Mama

33 & 34 Weeks

She is getting bigger & bigger! Although I am still getting some body shaking kicks, most of her movements now as rolls and turns and as her whole body shifts so does my belly! I wake up in the morning now to find her usually balled up on one side of my belly or another. This has been a favorite of hers to do for a little while now. If I wake up on my right side, she is usually all the way on my right and I can feel a series of hard lumps all the way down the right side of my belly. Usually, when I am waking up I feel a few flurries of activity but she is pretty quiet. I pray this means that she likes sleeping in the morning as much as I do haha. Nighttime is still her most active period which I think is probably true of most babies, fetuses and newborns alike. I can't always discern what bump is what but i'm fairly certain what I am feeling on either side of my belly button are her elbows or arms. I had though before that she was sideways but she is most certainly right side up (which is to say wrong side for labor haha).

Yep, she's still a little breech baby! We had our appointment on the 30th and she is definitely still head up. Still doing fine. Still cooking in there. Our next appointment is on September 13th and if she is still breech then we need to make some decisions. We can either have the doctor try to turn her or go ahead and schedule our c-section. We have come to the decision to go the c-section route for certain if she is still breech. There is still time yet for her to flip but as I've mentioned before I think she is quite content as she is. I am less and less nervous about the c-section (that may change as the day gets closer) and we are getting more and more prepared for that scenario. I have joked though that the more prepared we are the more likely she will flip around last minute to pull a fast one on us!

If we schedule the c-section, we will shoot for October 7th depending on what doctors are available. We're hoping this would only mean 1 day difference between Chris going back to work and my parents arriving in town for 2 weeks. Obviously, we have Chris's family close by to check in which is fantastic but of course I want my mom and dad there as soon as possible! It makes me a little sad they won't be able to visit in the hospital but I am happy that they will be able to spend the full amount of their visit with their new granddaughter. That was very important to me. It is still odd to think that I may never have a "typical" labor and delivery but I just want her here safe & sound so I am accepting that this is how she will more than likely enter the world. Good news for her, it's almost no trauma to her to come into this world via planned c-section. No tough labor or squishing through a birth canal. Just lifted gently on out of my belly. I mean am I great hostess or what?

October 7th would be a couple days after I turn 39 weeks so if that's the case that means 4 weeks from tomorrow I will be having Adelaide in my arms. I don' t think I have fully processed that yet!! We are more than ready for her (at least in our hearts and I believe in our home with the amount of stuff we have haha). We just can't wait to focus on this angel 110%!!!

Dear Adelaide,
Don't worry, Mama is going to leave you alone in there. You seemed to have made up your mind on what is best for you and I am not going to change that. I like to think that you are an independent woman already haha. I have a feeling this won't be the first time you make up your mind and won't budge. I can't say your Mama was much different. I have washed your clothes and unpacked all the odds and ends in your nursery and organized it as much as I could. Your Daddy has put everything together (except the stroller which is still baffling us haha) and we are getting every little loose end tied up as best we can before your arrival. We are trying to keep ourselves busy so the time passes by quickly until we meet you. We are simply amazed that in a matter of weeks you will be here with us and our lives will never be the same and we are so ever looking forward to that moment. It seems we've waited our whole lives just for you!

All My Love,
Mama

Weeks 30, 31 & 32

Oops, fell a litlte behind on the good ole blog! In my defense, we have been busy bees the past few weeks and I got a virus on my computer that had my internet down for almost a full week (how I survived, I'll never know). But, I'm back! And with an incredibly long post!

8 months in! Wow. Unbelievable. At the same time, I sort of can't believe we have another 8 weeks to go. Time went so fast in the beginning and it is really dragging onnnnn now. I am certainly feeliing large and in charge now haha. There are definitely no, "is she pregnant?" momemnts like the 1st trimester (looking back on that makes me laugh; I really thought I looked like I had a belly). Katie says you get body dysmoprhic disorder at this point and think everyone around you is skinny. She might be right about that! I even look at pics of myself from before I was pregnant and think wow, how could I think I looked fat in that picture? I was nothing! It's like reverse self esteem booster or something haha. All that aside, I do love my belly, but it really does make it more and more difficult to get comfortable when I sleep and in general. Lugging around this belly makes me feel exhausted by the end of the day. I try to keep pretty active but have definitely noticed a difference even when going for a walk. The weight really presses down hard and it takes more and more energy to get this body around!

I'll backtrack a bit to our last doctor's appointment which was when I was 31 weeks exactly. We had a very routine checkup. Weight was 23lbs overall which still has me on track for my goal. Blood pressure good. Her heartbeat good. Doctor went to check her position in my belly..."hmm," he says, "I'm not sure what position she's in. Do you have time for an ultrasound?" Okay, first of all hearing your doctor say "hmm" is always a little disconcerting and why would I not want an ultrasound?? He assured me everything is fine; he just needed to get a better idea of how she was lying. Of course this is the appointment Chris isn't at! Last one was in and out and this one we get an ultrasound! Anyway, the doctor does the ultrasound and it's what he thought - she's breech. Breech means (for those non-moms reading) that she is head up and legs down. Not the position she is supposed to be in for delivery. We have up until 37 weeks for her to flip herself around. Most babies will on their own. If she does not flip on her own there are two options: ECV or Version where the doctor manipulates my belly from the outside in order to attempt to turn the baby or a scheduled C-section. If we opt for the Version and it doesn't work or she flips herself back then we're back to the C-section anyway.

So, not exactly how we had planned this whole birth process to go! She still has a few weeks to do it on her own and maybe she will. I have a sneaking suspicion she won't. The funny part is, she now seems to be in a transverse position or sideways. I could be wrong, but it feels like there is a hard bump on either side of my belly button and my belly is not super firm above or below, just on either side, which makes me think she is sideways. A sideways baby. She is a character already haha. I have my next regular appointment on Friday so we will find out if she has shifted at all. We are now in the process of researching what goes into a Version and the risks versus having the C-section. As the doctor said, she may flip on her own and we won't need to worry about any of that but I want to be prepared and my feeling is she's not budging. From what I can read about the Version, it is very low risk to mom and baby. It would be performed in the hospital. They would give me a shot to relax my uterus as to prevent contractions. The doctor then would literally put his hands on my belly and try to turn her. I have read that if the first attempt doesn't work then the subsequent attempts probably won't either. They can go so far as to give you an epidural if they continue to try. The biggest risk would be to start up labor at which point I would need a C-section because she would still be in the wrong position for "natural" delivery. My main concern is not so much for myself (as I don't think it would really be painful as much as uncomfortable) as it is for her. It just seems like a very aggressive thing for little baby. I need to talk to the doctor more about it but my initial thought is if they thought that there is a good chance it could turn her (it's about 60% success for breech and 90% for transverse) than maybe we would consider it but I would want one attempt only. If she doesn't move after one attempt then she is not meant to move. And then it's on to the C-section....

C-sections make me nervous. I know plenty of women who have had them and thank God I don't think I have heard one personal horror story yet. If you know one, please do not share it with me! They make me nervous for several obvious reasons: it's a surgery (I've never had one), there are even more unknowns than with natural delivery (as far as I've been exposed to) and the recovery involved. I think I am most nervous about the recovery. The idea of being laid up and generally helpless after having this little baby concerns me. I want to take care of her. I don't want others needing to take care of me. I know even after regular labor and delivery you still need to take it slow and there is obviously recovery involved in that too but I know more what to expect from that. The hospital stay is longer (which I won't lie, even with my insurance we still need to pay per day and I wasn't looking forward to paying for 1 or 2 extra days on top of the regular 2). There are just things I wasn't interested in experiencing haha.

Now, I realize I could get a bunch of lectures/pep talks explaining to me that pregnancy and childbirth are full of the unexpected, I get that, but I highly doubt anyone I know who has had a baby went into it thinking "I'm going to get a C-section and I'm cool with it." I also realize that C-sections happen quite often and quite successfully. I get that too. I know that people recover and are totally fine after. Yup, get that too. However, I have a limited time off of work. Chris has a limited time amount of time off work. We need to "recover" as quickly as possible. I want as much time off of work spent with her in enjoyment and not restricted. Yes, the unexpected happens but that doesn't mean I don't wish for what I WANT to happen. If we need to go the C-section route, that's what we will do. And, I'm sure it will be fine and I'm sure I will enjoy my time off with her regardless. I just still need to wrap my head around the possiblity. My reaffirming factor in all of this is that she would be just fine. She will come out perfect and happy and healthy. And that means an immense amount to me and I want to do what is best for her but I would be lying if I said I wasn't thinking of me in this too! We'll wait and see. In the meantime, I just keep reading as much as I can.

Now on to weeks 31 into 32. We traveled up north to go to my cousin's wedding. Travel was tough this late in the game. I must admit I felt exhausted most of the trip. It was more physically demanding than I imagined. I had a wonderful weekend but it took a lot out of me. I am still glad we went. We got to take Charlie to the 4H fair and play with him and spend time playing. We went down to Kent Island outside of Annapolis for the wedding which was absolutely beautiful. The place was wonderful and my cousin and his new wife looked incredibly happy. It was just tough not feeling like myself. Normally, I'd love to have a couple cocktails and live it up on the dance floor and I just didn't have it in me. I actually had to walk outside for a bit after dinner because I didn't feel well. That was frustrating to me. I'm not used to feeling like that. There were a couple other pregnant ladies there who were about the same as me and they seemed to be faring much better which frustrated me even more until I reminded myself that I had just flown up a little over a day ago and then sat in a car for 3 hours just prior. I think I need to cut myself some slack. We walked around the town of Annapolis for a little while and again that was frustrating. I couldn't keep up with Katie and Chris how I normally would up and down the hills and in and out of stores and I hated that. It is hard at this point to accept that I just need to slow down. Not that I live some crazy, rockstar life haha but even regular things I like to do I need to do slower. I physically am unable of doing them how I did them before. I think, more than anything, I am growing ever more ready and anxious to just have this little girl in my arms with me on my adventures and outside of my belly!

On to my letter and a story of my dramatic exit from PA...

Dear Adelaide,
Mama gave everyone quite the scare the other day. I was coming down the stairs at your Pop-Pop and Grammy's house. Your daddy was carrying our suitcases down and I had a bunch of glasses in my hand. My feet slipped on the last couple of stairs and I felt myself falling forward. I was so scared baby girl. I knew I would do anything so you wouldn't get hurt. It felt like time slowed down to a crawl. I remembered reading something in a book that said I shouldn't be carrying anything on the stairs that I can't feel like I could throw if I fell. So, I threw those glasses - far! I turned my body around as hard as I could so that I landed on my side and not on my precious belly. The glass had shattered and I cut my hands up when I put them out to brace my fall. I was scared. I saw blood on my hands and I felt so helpless. Your daddy scooped me up as if I were as light as a feather and carried us into the other room with your Pop-Pop trailing behind with a towel for my hand. Your mama was shook up but I don't think half as much as your poor daddy. The color seemed to drain from his face and he was shaking more than me. Your daddy and Pop-Pop cleaned up my hands and you gave me a blessing. You kicked and moved and shook up my belly as I sat there getting bandaged up. The relief was instantaneous. I am proud of myself for being able to protect you. I am proud of your daddy for being able to take care of us. I don't want to test either ever again! We love you so much and we would do anything to protect you before, during and after you come into this world. I promise to slow down. I promise to listen to my body and when it tells me enough is enough. I promise to take care of myself which in turn is taking care of you. We got checked out at the hospital to be on the safe side though your daddy and I knew you were okay. I had felt you moving the whole trip back and I just had a sense that you were fine. While we were listening to your heartbeat, the nurse commented, " you have one happy baby there." And I listened to your strong heartbeat and felt you squirming and kicking the monitors like the little bug that you are and I knew she was right.

All My Love,
Mama

28 & 29 Weeks (3rd Trimester)

We did it! We made it to the 3rd trimester!!

Wooo, what a busy 2 weeks it's been! Feels like we have been around the world and back! We had our shower (more on that in a separate post) which was absolutely amazing. We flew up to PA when I was just about 28 weeks. We had a bit of a rough travel experience. We flew up at night so that Chris & I could get a full day of work in first and our flight was delayed which would have been manageable if it weren't delayed then not delayed then delayed again... you get the picture. Thankfully, at one point we were given the option to deboard the plane while they figured out what the situation was (the delay was weather related). We were able to get back into the terminal and do some stretches. It is becoming more and more uncomfortable for me to sit for long periods of time. I feel like I am compressing my belly and more importantly compressing poor Adelaide. Neither of us likes that very much. The flight attendants were very sweet to me actually and asked me a bunch of questions and even gave us extra ginger ale haha. When we walked back onto the plane a guy in his seat said jokingly, "you're not going to have that on the plane are you??" Haha I replied, "I wasn't planning on it." Wait till they get a load of me during our next trip at nearly 32 weeks!

Overall, travel seemed to be more difficult this time around. Besides it being more uncomfortable to sit, I still tend to get motion sickness (especially during landing) and if I'm in the backseat of a car. I would get car sickness here & there before I was pregnant but not very often. Having my belly bounce around or move in any flip floppy motion is not a good thing for this mama. Travel just seemed to take more of a physical toll on me this time too compared to when I traveled last at about 17/18 weeks. It really is as though my body knew the second I hit the 3rd trimester and it slammed on the brakes. Even Chris noticed. He said the whole pregnancy has seemed so smooth and now you've hit a wall. Haha, that's exactly how I feel! It felt like she was hitting a growth spurt shortly before our trip as all the sudden my appetite seemed to skyrocket. My belly seemed to take off too! It was as if it was overnight. I got more uncomfortable, hungrier and more tired. Felt like I was back to square 1 at the 1st trimester!! The heat up north didn't help either. It was hotter there than in FL! Over 100 degrees. That was tough. That did nothing but make me feel more sluggish and puffy. Besides the difficulties of traveling, we really did have a wonderful visit full of family and friends and a ton of love for Miss Addie June. Absolutely worth any side effects!

We had our regular doctor's visit last week and Chris came with to hang out. A nice quick & easy visit! I gained 23lbs overall which puts me on track for a total of 35-40 probably when I deliver. I believe 35 was my original goal (I'd have to scroll back through my posts) so within the 35-40 range suits me just fine. As I mentioned above, it feels like she hit a growth spurt and with my appetite increasing I'm trying to put good stuff in my body as much as possible (although let's be honest a few treats get thrown in along the way). Sometimes it's tough though because my belly feels so full already from having her in there that even though I'm hungry I feel like I'm runnig out of room! Anyway, back to the doctor's visit. Glucose test came back with nearly perfect score. Heartbeat was strong. Belly measured right on track. Everything was A+! Always a great doctor's visit when that happens. We went through some questions about pediatricians and birth plans and the like and Chris & I have some homework to do in the next few weeks it looks like. I will now be going back every 2 weeks until I am 36 weeks so I will have plenty of opportunities to ask questions along the way!

I really am happy & blessed to be having such a wonderful pregnancy. Although I am starting to complain more & more about being tired & uncomfortable, I know that is 110% normal for this point in my pregnancy so I keep that in mind. I am lucky to have such a healthy & strong baby and to have great overall health. I remind myself of that everyday!!

Dear Adelaide,
Oh baby, mama is getting more and more anxious to meet you!! You are giving me quite a thrill lately with your movements. They certainly can't be missed! Your turns really crack me up. I can feel your whole little body twisting around. You feel so huge to me now but I know you're still just a little peanut. Some of the movements that really make me laugh are the real slight ones that feel like you're burrowing down in my belly. I call these your "snug movements." It feels like you're trying to find a nice cozy place to take a nap. You remind me of your mama with those haha! The busy bee times are all from your daddy I think. We constantly try to guess what you're up to in there or what it might mean when you're born. I am trying to keep myself busy with preparations for you (which there feels like there are still quite a few) in order to keep myself busy and not get too antsy. I know you need to bake awhile longer. I can't imagine how restless I'll be in the last few weeks! I am already so eager just to hold you and stare at your beautiful face and rock you to sleep and touch your soft skin and kiss your toes and oh my I'm getting carried away haha. It gets harder every day to concentrate on anything but you, my love! As I type this, you are quiet, probably taking a nap. They say you have sleep cycles now and REM sleep which can mean dreams. Do you dream about us as much as we dream about you? I can't imagine what goes through your perfect little baby mind. Well, until next time, Junebug, sweet dreams!

Love,
Mama

The Nursery

Here are some photos of the nursery! We got a ton of inspiration from that blog and just recreated it from different finds around the web. Some of the highlights are of course the poster with her name, the Jenny Lind crib, the embroidered alphabet poster, the starfish & seahorse mobile, the gold frame collage (just waiting for pictures of the beautiful Miss Adelaide June) and our repurposed furniture. We took the 2 dressers from our room and re-did them. The tall, grey one doesn't even look like the same piece of furniture! Chris has had that since he was young and it was very, very outdated. We gave it a fresh coat of paint and spraypainted the handles and VOILA a boutique worthy piece if I do say so myself. The white dresser just got some knew pink flower knobs and we'll use that as the changing table. The animal poster was hand embroidered by Chris's grandma and hung in his & his brother's nurseries. I just spraypainted the frame pink for her room. The photo collage are frames from Urban Outfitters. God bless Chris for laying those out and hanging those. I hated every second of just WATCHING him do it. We still have to add the growth chart that hung in my nursery as well. I love adding all the little touches from our nurseries. I think it adds warmth to the room. It has just been such a fun project. This little girl provides some of the best motivation around!

26 & 27 Weeks

Holy hell, how much bigger is my belly going to get?!? The past couple weeks I am really starting to feel like a big ole pregnant lady! Thankfully, my energy level is still pretty good so when I am up and moving I feel a-ok. Trying to get me out of a seated or lying down position or bending over - not so much. I can't just bend over to grab something off the floor (especially if I am sitting down) . I have to squat down to grab it haha. I feel healthy though. I am still doing my yoga, probably every other week, and going for walks and to the gym when I can. Or taking a dip in the pool to stretch out. My eating is still relatively the same which amazes both Chris and me. I think I mentioned this before, I definitely let myself indulge more here & there but I still have not had any crazy food cravings or bouts of crazy hunger. Still, when I am hungry, I do need to eat ASAP. Otherwise, I turn into a MPL (mean pregnant lady) very quickly!

Next week I have my glucose test where you drink this sugary orange liquid and they test your blood to see how well it is handling the glucose levels. My next appointment is the 29th and then I start going twice a week. That really hits home that we are in the final months!

We have finished her nursery (I'll put up a separate post with pictures) for the most part. We still have to get the rocking chair (we know which one we like though) and I'm sure add some final touches but overall it is pretty much done. We are so proud of ourselves, I won't lie! We worked hard on her room. We are joking that I was the brains behind the operating and Chris was the brawn. He let me take creative control of the room which I am grateful for. It has been such a fun and rewarding project for me. I am proud of myself for sticking with a vision (that doesn't happen often, I usually get ADD with projects). Chris has been absolutely wonderful about putting stuff together and doing most of the hard labor. He also had his creative suggestions as well and he has a very good eye for placement of things so between the 2 of us I think we really knocked it out of the park. It feels SO good to have this off her to-do list!

Our shower is next weekend and we are soooo excited. I cannot wait to see everyone and just have a nice relaxing time with friends and family. We opted to do a Jack & Jill shower (although we're not exactly calling it that) so that we would have an opportunity to see as much family as possible. Since most of my family is up north, this is a great chance for me to spend some time with everyone and for them to get to see my big belly! We already have been receiving some gifts and each one makes us so happy. We love to envision her with her new gear haha. I am excited to get everything put away in its proper place and washed and stored and get this nursery 110% complete.

Otherwise, I am feeling good overall. Big but good. I am hoping the last 3 months I can say the same!

Dear Adelaide,
Wow, did we have fun putting your room together! Your daddy and I really went all out. We think you have the best room in the house now, my love, and we wouldn't want it any other way! It feels so peaceful and calm in here and I hope you will feel the same. There will be so many hours of rocking and feeding and diaper changes and story time and (God willing) sleepy time in here. We wanted to provide you with the most tranquil environment possible. Anything we can do to make you as happy as you have already made us. We have started getting some more clothes for you, just basic onesies and jammies, and I find myself practically hugging the clothing just thinking about you in them. I think about smothering you with kisses and squeezing your little cheeks and how cute your little hands and feet will be. I can't believe we still have almost another 3 months until we meet you! Although I feel like we have much to do yet (your to-do list seems to get bigger instead of smaller) I feel as though we are so ready to just hold you and love you. But, please take your time! I want you to be good and ready to come into this world. Judging by your strong kicks I think you are growing fast and furious. I just cannot wait to snuggle with my little squirmy bug! You stay nice and cozy in there and we will keep plugging away at that to-do list...

All My Love,
Mama

24 & 25 Weeks

Looks like I'm smuggling a basketball under that t-shirt! Sneak peek at the crib there too.

Today marks my 25th week and according to some resources the start of my 3rd trimester! Some say the 28th week (which is 7 months in normal people land and who knows what in pregnancy land) marks the beginning which is more accurate sounding to me. Either way, time is really moving!!

Had my routine doctor's appointment today. Everything went well. First time getting my belly measured with the tape measure which was kind of fun actually. I'm about 25 cm which is right on track for 25 weeks (they say you should line up about the same as the number of weeks you are). Her heartbeat sounded nice and strong and you can listen for yourself in my previous post! They recorded it onto a little device for us to keep, how cool! She was being a wee difficult for the doctor though haha. He couldn't get a heartbeat right away and I wasn't worried considering I could feel her kicking and moving every part of her little body. The doctor said, "wow, she's a squirmer, did you just eat??" I told him I just had a little coffee and he said that explains it and laughed. She may have a little more energy than we think! My weight gain is right on track - 5lbs this month which was my goal and 17 overall. This will put me in the 30-35lb goal I had set for myself. Even if I were to go a little over, I would be okay with that. I'm just happy she's doing well! Next up we have to do a glucose sugar tolerance test to make sure I don't have any pregnancy related diabetes or any of that. After the next appointment at the end of July, I'll be going back to the doctor's every 2 weeks, yikes!!

It really feels like time is chugging along so we are trying to stay on top of our ever growing to-do list! Chris has been a madman putting anything and everything together that comes to the door (since the majority of our stuff is coming from online purchases and/or registry purchases from others). Our adorable bassinet (from Chris's mom, Adelaide's Grandma) and our beautiful crib (from my mom & dad, Adelaide's Pop-Pop & Grammy) are now up and assembled! It is so amazing to look around her room and see all these pieces come to life after daydreaming about them for so long. We will be taking photos of course (since I finally found my camera) and posting a nursery tour in the future. Until then, there is much more work to be done!

Dear Adelaide,
You are growing fast & strong my love! Good work! Your kicks are something else lately. I seem to feel every movement you make, even the slight ones. I absolutely love it. We are having so much fun preparing for you. Your daddy seems to take his role very seriously and has proven to be quite handy at projects! As a wife, it is really satisfying and heartwarming to see him like that. It just reassures me what a great dad & husband he is (as if I needed reassurance). You were cracking us up last night. Your daddy had his head on my belly as he does from time to time and was talking to you and not only did you respond to his voice but you gave him a kick in the head! You are going to be a playful little thing I imagine! I daydream about you all the time. I picture you in your little bassinet and then in your pretty crib and us going for walks in your stroller. I am practicing every bit of patience I can muster to wait for you. Just know you are always in our thoughts.

All My Love,
Mama

The Most Precious Sound

Our baby's heartbeat. There is no better music to our ears!

Nursery Poster

We'll be taking some more photos of different things for her nursery, but this is the poster we ordered to hang above her crib. I ordered a pretty gold frame and nice white mat to go with it. I think it will look very fancy for our little girl!

23 Weeks

I misplaced my camera (and by misplaced I'm hoping I don't mean lost!) so this is a photo from 22 1/2 weeks, I cheated a little. This is with Chris's sister, Sarah, soon to be Aunt Sarah to little Adelaide and half the reason for her middle name, June.

All is well here in baby land! The rash is a pain but I am managing it. I found out from a co-worker up north that she had the same thing when she was pregnant with her daughter. She said she got it about the same time as me and same deal as me, more annoying than anything else. She said hers went away as soon as her daughter was born which seems to be the norm with most cases. How weird!

Overall, I am feeling well. My sleep is a little better. I wouldn't say it's the deepest sleep in the world but I am sleeping! I am starting to really get a nesting instinct. I seem to have non-stop energy when it comes to cleaning and organizing. Thank God because I feel like there is so much more to do yet! I have started getting decorations in for the nursery and starting painting some things but the big stuff has yet to be done. I feel as though my work is never done haha. Of course, what normally happens then is I run myself ragged all day and if it's the same day I'm also working I end up completely exhausted by the end of the day. Maybe that's why I've been sleeping better! I do try to remember to kick my feet up and relax in between, I promise :)

This past weekend was Father's Day. Chris had to work the weekend but had off Friday so I switched days and took off Friday and made it up on the weekend. We spent a relaxing day together going out to lunch and the movies. Yesterday, I cooked his official Father's Day dinner. Stuffed pepper jack turkey burgers, mmmm. I made a spicy mayo (mayo, hot sauce and lime juice) to go with and Lord have mercy I could have dipped everything in sight in there!! Overall, we had a great weekend between him working and he even got to feel his first kick from the baby!!

Dear Adelaide,
This letter is all about your daddy! You gave your daddy such a wonderful father's day present! Last Thursday, while we were watching TV in bed, you were kicking like mad (as you often do when I lie in bed at the end of the night) and I grabbed your daddy's hand and put it on my belly and he felt your kicks! It was the first time he was able to feel them. The look on his face was absolutely priceless. It was an expression of pure amazement. It's difficult to describe what your kicks feel like to him and I often felt bad he couldn't feel you the way I do. He finally got to experience a piece of what I feel. He was so incredibly happy feeling those kicks. I think it was the first of many times he will be amazed by you my dear! You still react to the sound of his voice which brings such a happy feeling. I know he brightens up our day so much. I think we both get a kick out of him (sorry, but your mama loves a good pun). I can't wait until you are born and see you and your daddy interact. I envision so much laughter and playtime together. I even like to imagine a little tea party with all 6'2" of your daddy crammed at a mini table of tea and dolls. It melts my heart already thinking of the two of you together. We are really blessed and lucky to have him. I can't wait until next Father's Day when we will all be together!

All my Love,
Mama

A Photo from the Future??

I used an online morphing service to take a pic of me and and a pic of Chris and generate a photo of what our daughter could look like. Pretty freaky huh? Usually these turn out really odd looking but this one almost looks real! It is an exact mix of our features. Obviously, she could look more like me or more like Chris or maybe even another relative! But, it's still kind of crazy to see such a mix of the two of us. She is pretty cute I have to say!

Nursery Inspiration

The photo above is serving as major inspiration for our nursery! I am absolutely in love with the wall colors and luckily the blogger who did this nursery shared the exact paint brand and shade so we can check it out at Lowes. I plan on continuing the light pink, white and gold throughout along with some of the black & white and grey accents. We have a lot of painting to do! We are taking the furniture from our bedroom and repurposing it. We have a tall, skinny dresser that will be painted a dove grey along with white handles. A white long dresser to be used for the changing table that needs new knobs and a little bookcase that is color undecided! We are excited to add some personal touches - a growth chart that was in my nursery and an animal alphabet embroidered hanging done by Chris's grandma.

Chris has deemed me the "Project Coordinator" for the nursery haha. I think he is just overwhelmed by the 50 things I print out and/or show him on a daily basis! We are still going to incorporate owls into the theme and I have found some cute vintage owl decorations along with some prints we will add. A lot of work but so much fun to plan!

Photo/Nursery Credit: www.laybabylay.com
Some of the most amazing nursery ideas I have ever seen! So creative!

21 & 22 Weeks

(Green Dress Pic is @ 21 Weeks. Yellow Dress with Chris is @ 22 Weeks)

A twofer! I'm a little bit behind on my blog posting aren't I?

I had a doctor's appointment at 21 weeks. Actually met with a midwife who also delivers (whoever is on call the night I go into labor is who will deliver the baby so I'm trying to meet with all of them). She looked over my ultrasound results and everything looked good. All the measurements seemed to look good and be completely normal. Hooray! I checked out healthy as well. I put on a healthy 7lbs too, oops! Guess that's what happens when you eat ice cream every night for a week haha. I was never much for sweet treats at night but I had been letting myself indulge more than usual. I hadn't gained all that much before so I guess I was playing catch up. I was at 12lbs total though which is right on target for my goal of 30-35lbs. I can't imagine lugging around another 20lbs though, holy crap! I already feel enormous with an extra 12 on me. It's gonna be a long, hot summer my friends!

Sleeping has still be an issue. I tried pillows and even a snoogle (a body pillow) which did not go over well at all. The snoogle made me feel like a million degrees in the middle of the night plus Chris kept hitting it with his feet and legs moving it which then woke me up. The pillow between my knees helps a little and I added an extra pillow under my head which seems to help a bit more too. I just can't seem to get comfortable! If I'm in a deep sleep I'm okay but if I wake up for any reason it seems to be game over. My legs - more specifically my hip, upper thigh and butt region - cannot stay comfortable! Either start aching or falling asleep or getting a cramp. Very weird!! I wonder if she is on some type of nerve. Could be. I'm not far enough along yet to be getting the typical sleep problems so it's a bit of a bummer! I can take unisom or tylenol PM though so I've been biting the bullet and taking those here and there. I feel bad doing so but they're both approved as safe so I think it's best I get some sleep while I can!

My only other complaint is a rash I have across my belly and parts of my back. I seemed to have gotten it after walking around in a bathing suit (not even a wet one) all day when Chris and I went on a day trip. It was very hot out so I think sweat combined with a non-breathable material caused it but it does not want to go away! I am allowed to use cortisone cream so I am trying that for now and hoping it heals. It is not very itchy and more annoying than anything else. It could be pregnancy eczema which you are supposed to try to avoid water and heat while having - not an easy task in FL! Almost any rash is not harmful to baby so it's more just an annoyance for me. Hopefully it clears up a bit. My skin is on the sensitive side as it is so I'm not surprised I have this! If you or someone you know had something similar while pregnant, please comment this post! I don't think it's PUPPPS if any of you have heard about that. It occurs later in pregnancy and is supposed to be extremely itchy.

Otherwise, it has been good health and spirits for this mama. These other things bother me but as soon as I feel her kicking it puts me in a better mood! Even the other night when I was up from 3am-5am watching Roseanne reruns, I could feel her kicking like mad and I almost (and I stress almost) was happy I was awake to feel that much movement. Must be built into mamas! Guess that's why after they're born when you're really getting no sleep you can still love that little crying bundle of joy!!

UPDATE (6/10/11): Went to the doctor's today because the rash wasn't getting better. It is indeed PUPPPS. Bit of a bummer. Luckily, it seems like a mild case and since I've had it for 2 weeks now the doctor doesn't think it should probably get much worse. There isn't a "cure" for it but there are treatments. The doctor only suggested Eucerin lotion to calm it (luckily it has not been severely itchy which most cases are so steroid tablets and cortisone were not recommended). I did some research online and there is a soap (pine tar soap, random!) that people swear clears the rash up and a good all natural lotion that I ordered so we'll see if those two things work! There are some homeopathic herb treatments but I'm hesitant to try those without talking to the doctor first. Fingers crossed the soap and lotion helps! For anybody that has heard of this or googles it, I am NOWHERE near as severe as the cases you will see online. THANK GOD. I was terrified seeing those photos. I have a mild case and God willing it stays that way!!

Dear Adelaide,
Mama is trying to get some sleep I swear!! I did so enjoy feeling your acrobatics though. You seem to be more active in the evening and nighttime when I'm finally settling down. I do feel you from time to time throughout the day though. I think I am feeling mostly kicks as they are low in my belly. They make me laugh sometimes. I wonder if you're just having fun or if you're trying to tell me something. Like when I roll onto my belly when I'm sleeping and I feel you, I think you may be telling me to roll over haha! I enjoy this little bonding time we have. I really can't wait though for it to be felt on the outside. I feel bad your daddy can't feel what I feel. It makes me feel so connected to you. I have lightly felt movement with my hand on my belly but I think that's just because I can feel you on the inside too. He likes to give us both a bedtime kiss at night - one on the lips for mama and one on the belly for you! You still move a little to the sound of his voice and I read that you can now start hearing outside sounds and voices. We still like to picture what you will look like and what your little personality will be like. I wonder if you will be artsy or creative. You seem to have brought out my creative side! I can't stop thinking of new ideas for your nursery and new projects! You must be my little muse! The weekly email I get said that you are now almost like a miniature newborn. Everything is in place. Just time for you to grow, grow, grow! Keep on kicking away my love!

All my Love,
Mama

20 Weeks - Halfway There!

Update 6/28: I found my camera! So here are some belly shots from 20 weeks. I just got out of the shower which explains the wet hair and no makeup (and not looking at the camera haha).

Wow, halfway!! It's so weird to me because in some ways it feels like as if I have been pregnant forever (be sure to check back with me when I'm 9 months pregnant, I'm sure I'll laugh at this statement); in other ways it feels like it's flying; in some ways it feels as though there is so much time left before I get to meet Adelaide; and in other ways it feels as though there is not enough time left to prepare!

We have begun clearing out the spare bedroom. And by spare bedroom, I mean the only other bedroom we have besides ours haha. This room served as my personal walk in closet, storage space for items that didn't have a home (the island of misfit toys if you will) and my office. Unfortunately, it will still need to serve as my office although my desk and equipment only takes up the small wall to the side of the door so it's not very obtrusive. I have moved my stuff over to our master bedroom closet which is a walk-in but very small. I have started rounding up the stuff that needs to go to the garage which thankfully Chris cleaned out last week. Everything must go! I am attempting to sell some older clothing on ebay to pick up some spare change but I think that mission will be ending shortly and just give it to Goodwill.

Once we have everything cleared out, the fun can begin! Painting and decorating. We have decided to go with "Owls" as the theme. Cute, girly owls. I have a slight obsession and it doesn't help that there are a lot of freaking cute owl things out there! We are thinking of painting the nursery two different shades of a pale aqua color. I have found some really cute owl wall decals on etsy.com for behind her crib. We will probably go with a white crib. We are taking the furniture from our room and repainting and repurposing it. We'll be adding new knobs and fun colors. Probably splashes of pale yellow and pink. I'm excited for the fun projects but even with 5 months to go, I get nervous about getting it all done! I thinking there must be a slight nesting instinct this early on because I have had more energy to clean and organize than I ever had before! Better put it to good use!

I have a doctor's appointment next Wednesday so I'll have more updates about the baby and me then. Overall, I am feeling great. I am very lucky to have had a smooth pregnancy thus far. I have been pretty by the book as far as symptoms are concerned. My sleep isn't always great but most nights are pretty good so that's fine by me. The biggest news as of late is getting to feel Miss Addie June move about! I had thought I have felt flutters the past few weeks, and I think I had, but they are most certainly baby movements now. I feel little movements that can only be described by saying think of a little person doing somersaults in your belly because that is exactly what it feels like!! That has been a great feeling and I always look forward to the evenings when I lie down and she seems to pick up steam!!

Dear Adelaide,
I can finally say for certain I feel you moving! Although I think I have felt you fluttering around, when I was out to lunch with my friend last week I felt for certain somebody having a little dance party in there. I was sitting down eating pizza so maybe pizza went over well with you? I hope so because your mama loves pizza!! I have to say though one of my favorite moments was the other night when your daddy came home from work and he and I laid on the couch together. He laid his head on my belly and we were just talking, the two of us, and you started moving like crazy! I think you loved the sound of his deeper voice compared with mine and the sound of the two of us talking back and forth. I love to think of how you will know our voices right out of the womb. That amazes me. I try to talk to you more often now and even sing to you from time to time. Your daddy teases me about my singing voice but I know you don't mind (at least that makes one person in this house haha). We are going to make a mixed CD soon - the Adelaide Mix - and I plan on singing the songs to you so you recognize them when you are born. I am so glad to feel you move. It reassures me so much that you are doing what you are supposed to be doing in there. I am glad I am making a good home for you already because I feel like I have a lot more work to do on this side making a home for you! We do hope you like owls, little one, because I'm afraid you'll be seeing quite a bit of them! I look forward to our next appointment to hear your little heartbeat. Until then, keep on dancing away in there!

All My Love,
Mama

19 Weeks... It's a Girl!!!

Holy guacamole, it's a girl!!!

We had our ultrasound done yesterday. More importantly I should note that she appeared healthy and had a good heartbeat (finally got a #, 168) and was moving (eventually) around.

The ultrasound room was wonderful! We had a private room and on the wall they had a big flat screen tv mounted so Chris and I could just sit back and watch the show! Our tech was really nice and funny and outgoing and took her time showing us all the different parts and measurements. Our little girl (who we didn't find out was a little girl until the very end) was quite a modest lady! First of all, we had to wake her up. She was quite comfortable it seems before the tech started poking and prodding. She had to nudge her to get her moving. Then she yawned and stretched!! We were laughing because it seems she already takes after me haha! It took some more nudging and then she finally got moving. But, when it came time to see if she was a boy or girl, she kept putting her hands between her legs covering herself!! Hey, if she stays that modest her whole life, fine by her dad and me! She finally moved those hands and, it's a girl!! Without getting into details for sake of her modesty, they can tell it's a girl not by absence of a you know what but by 3 lines defining her lady bits. I never knew that! That's how the tech could tell for certain it was a girl.

One of the big highlights was watching her attempt to suck her thumb. She tried many times unsuccessfully, bringing both her hands up to her face and opening her mouth, until finally she got her little thumb right in there and all 3 of us (the tech included) applauded and yelled and poor little girl got startled and dropped her hand quickly out of her mouth. Too much commotion for her liking! It was just so amazing to see her movements. Some of them already so human which is so amazing to me since she has no one to mimic. The stretching and yawning and the thumb sucking that are all natural instincts, really cool. We saw her in 3D as well but that was a bit freaky haha. The tech warned us it wasn't going to be cute. She hardly has any fat on her so she appears somewhat skeletal which is not how you like to picture your little bundle of joy! Still neat seeing some of her features more defined though. The tech even complimented her adorable nose haha! We received a dvd of 10 photos (a few are above) and we just really enjoyed our time getting an inside look at our baby's temporary home!

Now that we know it's a girl we can finally reveal her name to all! We are so confident about our name that we don't mind telling anybody who will listen. Her name is Adelaide June. Adelaide is a name that Chris and I have liked for years now. It's the name of a song by the band Anberlin. We also used one of their songs for our wedding song. Seems fitting that our daughter's name comes from them as well! It's funny because I had really been wavering in thinking it was a boy the past couple weeks. I kept being less and less certain. And I kept thinking of the lyrics in the song, one of them "Adelaide, you really had me going this time." And I couldn't help thinking that our little girl really had us fooled she was a boy! Guess it was a sign after all! Her middle name, June, is in honor of her aunts Katie & Sarah. We wanted to find a way to honor both of them but we didn't like any combination of their names so we finally figured out a way to do it - they were both born in June and June is such a pretty name. Plus, we loved how it went together so Adelaide June it is!


Dear Adelaide,
Adelaide! We get to call you by your proper name!! The joy that gives me is unbelievable. Your dad and I are completely and utterly OVER THE MOON! A precious baby girl. A princess. Daddy's Girl! When the ultrasound tech told us, we just stared at the screen in amazement. A girl. More importantly - a daughter. I will just never forget how we felt yesterday. Your dad and I went out to lunch after we found out and I think we barely could concentrate on anything but thoughts of you! Our whole lives seem to flash before our eyes in the best possible way. What will you look like? Will you look like your mama with a mass of dark hair? Will you be tall and thin like your daddy? A song came on at the restaurant, one they play at weddings quite a bit for the Father/Daughter dance and my head reeled with the thought of you some day dancing with your daddy at your wedding. I thought of all the special times I had and still have with my dad, your Pop-Pop, and thought of how you will have that special bond with your daddy. I thought of you and I shopping together with your Aunts and Grandma's (on both sides haha!). I thought of so, so many things. It is amazing how one moment can define your life like that. Your daddy and I have always said that having children is where you get the enjoyment from in the second part of your life and that couldn't be any more true. It's as if I feel my new life separating from my old one. I foresee so much happiness and joy that your little self will bring to everyone around you. You are already so very loved. We area already so blessed and you haven't even arrived yet! So many wonderful things await you on this side. I only hope I can teach you to be a strong and independent woman like my mama has taught me. That every man treats you with respect the way your daddy treats me (the way he was taught by his mama). So many things I hope and dream for you my Adelaide!

All my Love Precious Daughter,
Mama

17 & 18 Weeks

A busy 2 weeks! The first shot is of my mom, sister and me in my parent's backyard over Mother's Day weekend (17 weeks) and the others are from 18 weeks before taking my mother-in-law out to dinner. I am wearing my brand new pair of maternity shorts that I would probably live in if someone let me. Why don't all article of clothing have stretchy bands?? Sure, we'd probably get huge and fat without realizing it but dammit we'd be comfortable!! Oh and the second picture is me with Mr. Max, one of my furry babies. He thinks he is a human child. Man, he is going to be in for a rude awakening!

I'll start off with the doctor's appointment last Monday. Everything was nice and healthy. Heard the heartbeat loud and clear. The doctor put the little microphone thingy (not a technical term I'm sure) on my belly and got the heartbeat on the first shot! I didn't get the official # and although it sounded much quicker than mine it didn't sound like it was racing. Not sure if that helps anyone in the boy vs. girl debate. I actually weighed in at only 4 more pounds so go me! I was telling my mom my appetite is not really all that different (or should I say not that much increased) and I had read in one of my books that you are usually hungrier with a boy. She said her appetite stayed the same with both my sister and me. Could it just be me? Could it be a sign? I was at 100% boy but now I am wavering a little, I won't lie. I digress.

The rest of the appointment went well. I met with a new doctor who patiently answered all of my questions and reassured me that taking Claritin everyday really is fine, my sleeping issues are normal and tylenol pm is perfectly fine and all of my previous blood work came back normal. He then gave me one of the things I was hoping for the most - the order for the ultrasound!! He asked that I wait a couple weeks and I obediently said yes and of course scheduled it almost 2 weeks to the day from when he gave it to me haha. Our appointment is next Tuesday (the 17th). I'll be polling everyone I know before then!

I flew up north on Thursday to visit my family. I would like to say that I had a very uneventful flight but that would be a lie. We had a terrible and turbulent descent & landing and I got horribly sick (without being graphic, no I didn't just FEEL sick; I WAS sick). The wonderful woman across the aisle from me handed me tissues and gum and was very sweet thank God. Of course I threw my pregnancy card on the table because you can't (well morally speaking) be mean to a pregnant lady. Other than that rough start, I had a fabulous weekend and it was SO great to finally see my mom and dad and give them great big hugs and have them rub my belly and give love to the baby. I got to spend so much time with my sister and nephew too. My nephew would pat my belly and say "hi baby" over and over again. It was one of the most adorable things I've ever witnessed. He is a freaking riot and I miss him already. It's so exciting to think of our baby and him playing together and in the future going to "Cousin Camp" (my mom's hilarious idea). Katie thinks if we have a girl that she'll be the boss but I don't know; Charlie bear has a pretty strong personality so we'll see! My mom, Katie and I went up to NYC to see my sister-in-law dance and Sunday, Friday was maternity shopping and Sunday went to Babies R Us and my sister gave me a ton of info on everything which was awesome. I wish I could have gotten to see some more friends but I did get a lot accomplished on my trip and came back happy but exhausted! It was just so great to spend so much time together. It always goes too fast.

Chris picked me up from the airport on Monday and we had our own little mother's day celebration. We went out to lunch and he gave me a really funny card and a beautiful necklace he picked out. We ran some errands and then went home and relaxed. All in all I had an absolutely perfect first mother's day! I can't wait until next year when I actually get to have the baby too haha.

The rest of the week is now flying by and here we are at 18 weeks, crazy! I can't believe in a couple weeks I'll be halfway through my pregnancy. Unbelievable. At the same time it seems like it is flying, it still seems so far away that we'll get to meet this little peanut. My pregnancy now is starting to be more and more enjoyable (physically speaking). I am still not sleeping 100% but it's much better than it was. I feel more energy. My belly is rounding out and looking actually pregnant. My hair looks so nice and healthy. I feel a bit more like myself! I am really enjoying being pregnant. That brings me to my letter...

Dear Baby,
I got to hear your heartbeat again. That always makes your mama so happy. I think from time to time I might feel you moving but I'm not sure if it's just wishful thinking. I have your daddy lay his head on my belly and I ask him if he can hear anybody haha so far not so much! I wonder when you like to move the most. I wonder if you're sucking your thumb like some of the books say. I cannot wait to see you again on your ultrasound so I can see those adorable arms and legs and that precious noggin. Of course we're hoping to see (or not see) something else too so please don't get too modest on us! We really cannot wait to call you our son or daughter instead of just "the baby." I was talking to your Aunt Katie the other day about how emotional it made me to think of you as my son or my daughter. It made you so very real. It made me proud of you already! I imagine I'll probably be that embarrassing mom in the bleachers yelling for you the loudest. You won't mind, right? Well, maybe when you're a teenager. Geez, a teenager?? I don't want to jump that far ahead. I am content to just think of you as a wee little thing snuggling in my arms. I like to just think of the time when you, your daddy and I will all be together. Our own little family. Your daddy said he really missed us when we were gone. I like that there is an "us." I love having you with me as my companion. Well my little one, I'm sure the next letter to you will be about how excited we are to find out if you are a little girl or boy. Until then I'll savor the anticipation of it all!

All my Love,
Mama

16 Weeks & The Great In-Between

A photo taken of me on the way to the grocery store by Chris who was laying on the floor - a real ace photography team we are!

16 weeks, 4 months... or is it? I don't quite understand how to figure out the months when it comes to pregnancy. 16 weeks is, in normal life, 4 months roughly. According to one book it's the 3rd month (I guess after conception) and to another I'm not in my 5th month until 18 weeks. I'll just leave it at 16 weeks.

In order to not jinx myself, I'm not going to talk about anything sleep related. Instead I will talk about the in-between stage I have found myself in. It's an odd stage to be in. According to the grocery store scale (which is the only thing I have to go by in between doctor's visits and so far has been accurate), I have gained about 5 pounds this month. That's a little more than I'd like in one month but overall I have gained about 6 pounds which is okay with me. It's difficult because I feel as though I don't want to be obsessive about my weight gain yet I absolutely want to track and keep an eye on it. I have always tended to be an average weight for my height. I was actually probably my thinnest in college which amuses me since my diet consisted of beer and ramen noodles. I think my metabolism hit a wall at about 25 or 26 and although I eat mostly healthy, anything unhealthy took a greater effect on me. During my pregnancy, I have eaten nearly the same and without alcohol that means an even healthier diet. I exercise. I could exercise more. All in all, I think if I continue with how I am eating and exercising I should gain an amount I'm comfortable with. But that's not what I am referring to with the great in-between...

Most of us could probably gain 5lbs (if we wanted to) by eating junk and being lazy. 5lbs is easily an amount that could be mistaken for simple weight gain - not pregnancy. I seem to not know whether I want to stick my belly out and arch my back (as in my previous photos) or stand up straight and suck it in as I normally would. Do I want to look pregnant yet? Is that okay? Should I look pregnant yet? I'm sure a lot of women struggle with the weight gain pregnancy brings. I am happy to gain the weight that my baby needs, do not get me wrong, but this stage is awkward. In that photo I am standing perfectly to the side (not 3/4 as in some of my previous photos) and standing up straight. I'd consider this a "normal" pose (well I don't typically stand around with my hands on my hips; Chris may disagree with that haha). Those that know me might notice the rounded belly as a baby bump but casual passersby would probably just assume that's how I normally look. So who cares about those random strangers? I'd love to say that I didn't. And truly I don't really, but I'd by lying if I said I didn't care about what I look like! I absolutely, 100% look forward to having a big ole belly and people on the street smiling at me knowing baby is on board. For now, this in-between is a very odd stage.

One thing I do know... it's time for stretchy pants!

Dear Baby,
I can't believe I will probably have to wait another month probably to find out what you are! I have a new respect for people who wait until their babies are born. Your mama can't handle the suspense! I seem to get more and more distracted lately daydreaming about your nursery and paint colors and decorations. It seems hard to focus on anything else sometimes. I read that you have eyebrows and eyelashes now. I can't even deal with how cute that is. I truly hope you have your dad's eyebrows because mine are screwy haha. I wonder what long lashes would look like if you're a boy? I wonder sometimes if you will surprise us with blue or hazel colored eyes as opposed to your daddy's and my brown eyes. We have some on your mama's side. Wouldn't that be a funny surprise!? I have a feeling you will have lots of hair. Your daddy was a bit of a fuzz head from what I can tell from photos but your mama had a mop of hair from the moment she was born. I have a feeling that trait may be pretty dominant. I feel bad sometimes because I tend to refer to you as "he" a lot so if you are a little "she" I hope you won't be too offended! I am looking forward to our checkup on Monday. I don't like not knowing what's going on with you. Now that the morning sickness has faded and before I can feel you move, I need to know for sure you're doing okay! I look forward to hearing your little heart beating again. Until then...

All my Love,
Mama

15 Weeks

I. Am. Sleepy. For real. I totally jinxed myself. I had a few nights of really great sleep and yesterday I felt like a million bucks, went for a long walk, went to the grocery store, made dinner, stayed up till after 11 watching tv without feeling like I was in a coma. I thought I GOT THIS DOWN! No siree. I need to work on clearing out my brain. This is the problem. I can't get comfortable physically (on my side it's just not comfortable, my leg falls asleep or my hip hurts). My normal position pre-pregnancy was on my side but half on my belly. I said this last post and I think this still that the baby is on my lower right side (or at least mostly there) because I feel very uncomfortable when I lay like that. On the flip side, on my left, not as bad. On my back I spazz because you're not supposed to lay on your back after 20 weeks (yes, I know I'm 15 weeks but try telling my subconscious that at 4am). So that's the starter, then we move on to random things running through my brain, weird dreams, etc. AHH! I started a little journal to write any worries I may have down. Mostly they are the typical worries - work, money, planning. I don't think they stress me but they pop up (along with a random song in my head - yeah don't ask) in the middle of the night. Chris and I had a conversation about his work and him taking off shortly before bed which was my fault because I brought it up. It wasn't a particularly taxing conversation, we just discussed it in general, but since I am Planny Magee it must have stuck in my brain. I have always been a pretty good sleeper. I usually can tuck things away until I wake up in the morning. I think the physical elements along with hormones and just a big life change are quite the mix.

For the most part, I really have been sleeping better. I have a LOT more energy. I think I need to exercise more now that I have this energy. Since I work from home, even not commuting on a daily basis tends to give you more energy which is usually a good thing but I was used to being so exhausted the past few months that it didn't matter. Now that I have more of an energy level like I did pre-pregnancy I think I need to treat it as such. Pre-pregnancy when I started working from home I remember having so much time & energy I didn't know what to do with myself and it was hard to wind down. I think that's what's happening now. The worries are not actively stressing me out. I am not sitting around all day pulling my hair out. Writing them down helps because it helps me to see there are easy solutions to most. Does anyone have any suggestions for winding down before bed? I usually have a snack and/or a glass of milk but I could use some relaxation techniques I think.

In other news, I went to prenatal yoga this past Saturday and that was wonderful! My lower back had started hurting by the end of the day. Although I have probably only gained maybe 3-5 pounds total, I think my posture is changing. As I read in one of my books, you tend to start sticking your belly out more and more to look as pregnant as possible haha and I think I am tending to do this. By the end of my yoga class, my back pain was alleviated and I felt like a noodle in the best possible way! There were a couple other girls in my class who were farther along than me (seriously, is it farther or further?) and it was reassuring to see that it's something I can continue to do. As with most yoga instructors, this one was super friendly and calming and took her time to readjust our positioning as needed. This is something I definitely plan on continuing in the future.

Letter time...

Dear Baby,

Mama promises to sleep better! I make sure if I don't I take a nice nap for you (and me). Even though you're a wee one yet, I rub my belly where I think you are and make sure I send you "good vibes" on a daily basis. If I feel myself getting stressed out or worked up over something silly, I take a deep breath and remember that I have something much more important and wonderful happening. It is a great way to stay grounded and focused on what's important. I was reading a book last night and in it the woman lost her baby when she was 4 months pregnant - this probably also did not help your mama sleep any better. I felt myself tearing up - even now - at the mere thought of that. You are such a part of my life already I'm not sure what I'd do without you! You are already such a great baby and I am lucky you have hardly caused me any hardships haha. Maybe a few weeks of being sick and maybe being tired and a little sleepy now but overall it has been such a great pregnancy. I must admit I am getting VERY anxious to find out if you are a little girl or little boy. Some people already know the names we have for you but they don't know your middle name and we're excited to have a name to call you in the near future. You keep on growing up the fruit scale (you're an apple now) and do your thing!

All my Love,
Mama